Kendall had a paracentesis done on Friday, where they drained SIX LITERS of fluid from his abdomen (which wasn’t even all of it, but all they felt they could safely remove). This is a picture of the fluid they were draining. It should be the color of dark yellow urine, but Kendall’s was mixed with blood from his internal bleeding. So add one more new fluid you are getting exposed to on this highly informative (gross? fascinating?) blog.
Kendall was more comfortable after that procedure, but he is still retaining a lot of fluid (non-functioning kidneys and liver will do that to you), especially in his feet, legs, and abdomen. The doctors tried intermittent dialysis last night, but Kendall was not able to tolerate having any fluid taken off so they switched him to the continuous (CRRT) dialysis today. He’ll be on that for a few days and then they will reassess where things are at. Kendall’s liver numbers were also elevated today from yesterday, so they are watching carefully to see if they will need to restart the defibrotide.
Other than those updates it was a fairly slow, quiet day. Such a vast improvement over last Sunday! It was also followed by a blessedly uneventful drive home, and a nice dinner at my sister’s house with my kids. I’ll take it! I often have nurses or medical staff comment on the fact that I wear a dress to the hospital on Sundays, but it’s a way for me to set that day apart from every other day of the week that I spend there. And I am SO thankful for virtual church meetings! It sometimes gets busy (and noisy) there in Kendall’s hospital room, but I love being able to connect with my church congregation, or my self reliance group, or Grandma craft time on Zoom, even though I am sitting in an ICU room.
Crazy to think that Kendall is now going on his fifth week in the ICU. I had (mistakenly) assumed that it was not uncommon for patients to have lengthy stays in the HICU. Nope! Earlier last week I was speaking with one of the social workers. She has worked in the HICU for eight years, and she thought there had only been eight patients in all that time who had been there more than a month. (And she remembers one of them who was able to go home….) Wow! Still, we’re hopeful that Kendall will be able to continue to make the progress needed to eventually move back down to the BMT floor. A lot of things are still up in the air at this point.
This last week was a grueling one for me, but even in the midst of a particularly difficult week, I knew the Lord was there. I was reading Alma 31 last week, and verses 31-33 and 38 really stood out to me in a new way: “O Lord, my heart is exceedingly sorrowful; wilt thou comfort my soul in Christ. O Lord, wilt thou grant unto me that I may have strength, that I may suffer with patience these afflictions which shall come upon me… “O Lord, wilt thou comfort my soul, and give unto me success, and also my fellow laborers who are with me–yea, even all these wilt thou comfort their souls in Christ. “Wilt thou grant unto them that they may have strength, that they may bear their afflictions which shall come upon them… “And the Lord provided for them that they should hunger not, neither should they thirst; yea, and he also gave them strength, that they should suffer no manner of afflictions, save it were swallowed up in the joy of Christ.”
That promise holds true for each one of us, no matter what trial (or 50) we may be facing at the time, no matter how heavy or seemingly insurmountable they seem in the moment. I had the opportunity to talk about our cancer journey and my family’s experience with some different people today. Those discussions, along with some talks on gratitude I listened to, have really caused me to do some reflecting throughout the day. I’m in awe of the way the Lord has put certain people in my path who have had such big impacts on me and my family. I’m thankful for connections I have made (or rekindled) over the last seven months, and lessons I have learned (and am still learning) and ways I am growing. I’m grateful for days like today where I can feel recharged. I have such gratitude for ongoing revelation. And numerous reminders of God’s love for me that are evident when I just take the time to notice and acknowledge them all around me.