Excited for 2023

I really love the start of a new year. Sure, there is some relief associated with leaving behind the busyness or pressures of the holidays, or now the grief surrounding them. But I have always enjoyed taking advantage of this time to reflect on what happened the previous year and taking stock of where I’m at, setting and working on goals, determining or reprioritizing what I feel is most important.

So where does that put me now? As with any year, 2022 included things I couldn’t have begun to imagine at the start of it. 2023 will of course be the same. I don’t want to even speculate, although I have decided it will be a good year, so it will be. I’m discovering more and more how powerful it can be to set my mindset ahead of time as to the type of experience I want to have, and then see how that becomes self-fulfilling. I want to feel confident, or enjoy myself, or feel grateful, etc.? Then I very intentionally decide I will be, and while never perfectly, to some degree it does happen. If I go in with an attitude that every experience can be valuable, then even things that are difficult or disappointing become experiences I can learn from. It’s a much better place to be rather than beating myself up for ways I inevitably fall short of my ideal.

My focus word for 2022 of EMBRACE was an apt one, and something that I worked hard at all year to be able to do. I wanted so much more than merely accepting my life circumstances, or just getting through whatever trials there would be (and there were many). I wanted to get to a place where I could recognize those circumstances (even the trauma processing) as actual blessings in my life, and come to love not only who I am and who I am becoming, but also where my life is now. And despite some ups and downs as I was further stretched beyond what I could have previously imagined, I do feel that overall I accomplished that. I do love and embrace my life. I have found greater joy and peace than I think I have ever experienced. I can acknowledge how blessed I am. All while experiencing, and yes, eventually coming to embrace, even the painful emotions and challenges. I’m not perfect at doing so, but I can see how much growth I had with being able to do this throughout 2022 (which not going to lie, also at times felt like an accomplishment just surviving through).

That leads me to this year. What “flavor” or focus do I intend to have for 2023? You know that I put a great deal of thought (and even prayer) into this, and I considered a lot of different words. The one I kept coming back to, though, was ENGAGE. (Hey, no joking about that word possibly having a second meaning that I didn’t intend!) So much of 2022 found me exhausted, both emotionally and physically, as I struggled to find a manageable work/life/home balance (isn’t that an issue for us all? I’m still working on this), as I was once again bowled over by and reset with grief, did my most intensive trauma work, took far too long to physically recover from Covid, etc. There were too many times when it was easy to let things slide, to simply not do or put off the things I knew I should be doing, to merely go through the motions (or sometimes not even do that much) as I was processing and fielding so many other things. Even if at times that may have been an important part of letting myself heal.

I don’t mean that I’ve been lazy this past year. Anyone who knows me knows that I have a tendency to take on more than I should, am often pushing myself to do do do more and more. To fill my life with far too much busyness. I am naturally a do-er, which isn’t always a bad thing. But that’s not what I mean by committing this year to engage. Too often grief and trauma can affect a person’s motivation, can lead to full-blown depression (so thankful there is help for this). Conversely, engaging means being an active and intentional participant. 2023 is going to be my year to purposely engage (or perhaps re-engage?) with the different areas of my life. To realign my priorities. To not merely go through the motions. To nudge myself forward to just act, and be fully present for the things that matter most rather than hesitating or delaying. I also don’t want to hold back from experiencing new things. I want to be actively involved, not make excuses.

And I know that with Heavenly Father’s help I will be able to do so (although patience with the process, Suzanne). For me the idea of “dreaming big” doesn’t necessarily mean having big elaborate plans or goals, but rather trusting and having faith that I will be able to accomplish the things that matter most, will be able to continue becoming the person I am supposed to be. Even with limitations on my time and resources that I didn’t use to have.

I recently read something that really resonated with me. The author pointed out that it is a lie when we tell ourselves, “I don’t have time for ____________.” The truth is that we do have the time, the same 24 hours in a day as everyone else. It’s really that something isn’t a priority right now for us. Isn’t that a better way to think about it? We all have our agency and get to choose how we use our time, where we focus our attention and efforts. I love the mind shift that idea creates, going from possible feelings of scarcity, or overwhelm, or guilt, or loss, or maybe even resentment, toward a sense of purpose, gratitude, perhaps even control, and being intentional about what is important to us.

What will your priorities be for this coming year? I would love to hear about them, and how you intend to engage yourself in the process of working on and achieving your goals. I learn so much from the experiences and perspectives of other people!